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Tuesday, August 30th, 2005
3:56 pm - Handsex is the devil, yo.

I haven't written anything on here in forever. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I really don't think anyone reads this.

Indiana is just around the corner. Not really looking forward to it, but then, I don't really look forward to anything anymore.

So, I updated.



current mood: cranky

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Monday, August 1st, 2005
8:13 am - *sigh* I will probably regret this....

Et maintenant, pour le jeu...Collapse )

current mood: cynical

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Friday, July 22nd, 2005
4:08 pm - Holy Hell
Bought some water guns at walmart and had a gunfight at Gilmer High. It was quite amusing.

Hopefully we will be going shopping this weekend. School clothes and what have you. I need to find some mary jane docs to go with my new dresses. And look for a picture of the short haircut I want. I think I am just going to have to describe it and pray to all the gods and goddesses that the person who cuts it doesn't fuck it up. I can always shave it, yo.

I have to buy Warped Tour tickets tonight...I really hope it isn't too hot at the concert. I have no idea how I am going to keep the sun from frying me to a crisp. I would hate to embarress A with an umbrella! Mwahahahaha!

Must do.

Find haircut pic
Cut hair
Give hair to Locks of Love
Find Mary Janes
Shopping for all of us
Dye A's hair....again
Balance checkbook
Sleep
Plant the remaining plants
Sew up the minute tears on my new vintage dresses
Take A to Violets for mad discounts
Get that new Frank Miller Batman comic.

I have no idea what I am going to do once school starts. I guess be verra bored and lonely.

*sigh*

current mood: bitchy

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Monday, July 18th, 2005
7:25 am - Thank the gods...
Our company has gone home, FINALLY. I know I am not the only one to be celebrating this. Gah. What a fucking fiasco. Could we possibly spend a bit more money on gas and nasty fucking beer? I think NOT.

Saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and loved it. We are definitely going to have to see that again. Am making my way through the new HP, sharing it with A...am liking it. Not really loving it yet, though.

Today is gonna be busy.

Pick up A's new glasses
Bank
Bills
Buy school stuff
Go by the school
Convince my man to allow the guaging to continue

I don't see the big deal. Mine were a bit larger than 5/8 of an inch when I removed them and they have shrunk back to about an 8. I think he is just trying to make it go slower....grrr. I don't know about her, but I am ready for them to be done already. At about a 00. Hmmmmmmm. Oh, yeah. list...

Pierce A's ears again...2x
Go through clothes
Clean house to rid it of all evidence of company
Secure tickets (for what you ask??? Mwahhahahaha!)

To everyone reading this.....PLEASE pray or think good thoughts or send positive energy (whatever your thing is) for A and her brother. Think happy thoughts. Please, please, please let everything turn out ok. *gulp*

Ok..off to do shit that grownups do. fuck.

current mood: busy

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Wednesday, July 13th, 2005
1:02 pm - Yeesh.
I am seriously over this missing voice thing. It seemed a bit fun at first, but now I am just having a hard time getting my point across. Can't hear and can't fucking talk either. Fanfuckintastic.

My little sister and her boyfriend are visiting from Florida and we have been GOING for days now. Verra tired. Verra sorry that I gave my sister the sickness and now she is crashed out in my bed.

I guess I am gonna go dye A's hair....orange this time. Need to talk to Scot about the guages too. He appears to be the more responsible of the 2 of us, although he argued A's case for Warped Tour. They won. So, we'll go. And I will be the one trying to drink my fear of large crowds away. Say hi to me.


Oh...read V for Vendetta...graphic novel..fantastic.
And The Watchmen. My fucking favorite. I am in love with Rorschach. Yeah, baby.


Oh...A! Thank you for all that help with the plants and whatnot. I really appreciate it. It is so hard to find good free help. Mwahahahahahaha!!!

current mood: bitchy

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Monday, June 20th, 2005
8:55 am
Gah. I am completely used up. I am so tired of wasting all of my emotional energies on this bullshit. Life is too fucking short to be lingering and re-hashing shit on a daily basis. AAAAAARRRRRgghhh.

I really hope we get to relax on our trip. I just want to be Away from all of this and pretend, if only for a little while, that the bitch is just a really unpleasant dream. I can't wait to take the niece to the used cd stores and all that is strange Orlando. I know she will love it. I am hoping that she will love my family as much as they already love her. Our friends and family are so loving, I know we will have a good time.

I have way too much shit to do today. I don wannou. I want to curl into a ball and sleep. But I can't. Because I am a fucking adult and adults have fucking responsibilities. Grrrrr.

I always knew I was capable of murder....I just never knew how much I wanted to do it. Thank goddess I have some measure of self control. Prison is just a knife thrust away.

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Tuesday, June 7th, 2005
3:32 pm - I can't believe this is my life.
I am angry. I am hurt.

I want you to know that NONE of this is your fault. None of this is because of you.

We want to make sure you have every opportunity to succeed and be yourself. We love you and will do everything we can to keep you safe and happy.

The things that have happened in the past month mean nothing. None of this stuff matters. Life is so much bigger than all of this.

The saying, "That which does not kill you, makes you stronger" is absolutely true. You might not believe it, but I have been through a lot of shit that should have killed me. It didn't and I am SO much stronger now. I will always be here for you and I hope you know you can trust me. I will never tell your secrets, I will never make you talk about things you don't want to talk about. If you wanna cry, cry. I won't force you to tell me why. I understand.


yeah. so...I hope you are ok and that you know that we are so glad you are alive.

current mood: enraged

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Wednesday, June 1st, 2005
1:24 pm - internet training iz the devil....
SO, am soing lots of internet training. I love it. It is so much fun.

Really.

Only 26 more days til the MCR concert in Florida. Plus I will get to see my mom, gma and sister. I miss them so. Gma is doing chemo and her hair has started falling out. I just want to hug her.


Yeah, not much going on here. Lots of internet training. Which I love.


I received some beautiful handmade cards today. They made me feel good.


Man. I am so blah to day, even my typing is monotone.

current mood: blah

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Wednesday, May 25th, 2005
10:56 am - Spin is good for happiness
My man drove 40 miles out of his way to find the coveted Spin magazine. He is the sweetest person on this planet. And he really adores our magnificent housemate.....


Hungry now....

current mood: blank

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Tuesday, May 24th, 2005
9:08 pm - I am eternally grateful. I mean it. REALLY>
I am SO glad that our lovely housemate has similar taste in music, because I would hate to have to listen to some pop crap. Thank all the powers that be that her tastes in music are not only tolerable, but enjoyable. *sigh*


On to do grown up duties like laundry and dishes. Great fun, I tell you.

current mood: amused

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6:00 pm - Alas, mental illness is often a blessing...
So, no Spin. And also no cassette tapes(the item that was not purchased from Walmart). Every psychiatrist that our lovely housemate has seen has just marveled at her intellegence and just go on and on about how unbelievably articulate she is. I wish I could take more credit, but it's all her. She is one of the most creative, loving and intellegent people I know. I am so proud of her. Period. She is just lovely and I am thankful to have had the opportunity to know her better. You know who you are. I heart you verra, verra much. Mwah.


So. I have been reading a most revealing book on Janis Joplin and her demise. This book is much more racy than the others I have read thus far. The woman had balls of steel and a voice to die for. She was 27 when she died. It makes me take a "good, hard look" and realize that life is SO short and that every fucking second needs to mean all the things that are never said. So, love as hard as you can and live like you'll never get caught. Um....that wasn't great parenting advice, Mademoiselle, so don't fucking hold me to that, umkaythanks.

Time keeps moving on,
Friends they turn away, Lordy Lord.
Well, I keep moving on
But I never found out why
I keep pushing so hard a dream,
I keep trying to make it right
Through another lonely day.

Whoa don't discover it lasts ...
Honey, time keeps a-moving on, hey yeah, yeah yeah.
Well, I'm twenty-five years older now
So I know it can't be right
And I'm no better baby and I can't help you no more
Than I did when I was just a girl. Yeah!



Don't, honey, don't you expect any answers, dear,
Ah, I know they don't come with ease, no, no, no, no.
Hey, I ain't never gonna love you any better baby
'Cause I'm never gonna love you right
So you better take it now, I said right yes now, yeah.







Take it now, Right Now.



It doesn't make any difference, babe. And it never, ever will.

She is so fucking right.

current mood: melancholy

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7:31 am - You can tell me all about it.
Well, all I really wanna do is go back to bed, but that certainly isn't an option. Have to get up, have to be responsible. Gah. Adulthood is daunting at times.

Hem. Yeah, so gotta take said housemate to the doc, and then to look for the most coveted Spin magazine, for it has MCR on the cover. Must find. Must find. Then what? I don't know. The future is wide open. As always.

current mood: contemplative

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Monday, May 23rd, 2005
1:19 pm - Hrmmm.
Ok. I have finally gotten a livejournal. Should I now feel complete? I don't. *sigh*

Well, the summer has "officially" begun and the Possibilities are endless. I hope that I actually make some progress for a change. Am eternally deciding to "do the right thing" and "get motivated", but it never happens. I am swearing now to "do the right thing and get motivated". I will not read slash everyday. I will not, I will not, I will not. Um. Okay, maybe I will only read it every other day...yeah, that's it! Every other day. Gotta wean onesself, kwim?

Have a new housemate. She is related to us, and I think that this will be a positive experience for all involved. Am looking forward to the positive changes that are coming our way.

Right. So. Hello world. Here I Am.

mwah.

current mood: geeky

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